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Toys on you. Yoni Massage. But clearly I am still prey to my conservative upbringing in a sleepy north Auckland suburb that boasted the sexual wattage of a weak lightbulb. I found Marco on a website advertising mainly female sex workers, newzealandgirls. His profile promised he was approachable, but I wonder how closely he will match his online description.
When he walks up to the table my nerves immediately settle.
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With his small black eyes and grey stubble tingeing the skin on his jowls, he's more cute teddy bear than Velcro-yanking stallion. And then we get talking. In when he decided to give male escorting a try, he discussed it with his partner. He gave her, hypothetically at least, a choice: would she prefer him to sneak around behind her back, bedding other women?
Or would she prefer him to find legitimate clients and bring home some extra cash on top of his day job? The relationship survived. He says she has never doubted him. He has built his business around two types of client.
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The first is single but under-confident. She is often, in his words, "on the larger side", and is aged anywhere from 30 to plus. She is looking for a safe, gentle date who will not reject her. Marco might go with her to a function or out to dinner before taking her behind closed doors for sex. The second is a married woman whose husband doesn't satisfy her sexually any more.
Often she sees Marco behind her husband's back, but occasionally the husband makes the call to Marco for her. He might want to watch his wife have sex with Marco, voyeur style, or he may be much older and want to buy her the sex he can no longer deliver. Marco pampers clients with his personal specialty, an erotic full-body massage. He says 90 percent of his clients are satisfied with this, and 60 percent don't request full sex afterwards.
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From the moment a client walks in the door, he tries to make her feel important and beautiful. Then, ditching his high-minded ideals, he leans in to confide his views on women of various different races and social classes. He claims he can work out over the phone which nationality he is talking to, and what "level" she is. He prefers "upper class ladies". He says there are men out there who are happy to service "lower class ladies" — he'll leave it to them.
He reveals the kind of old-school racism, blatant and unashamed, that I haven't come across for years. I feel a kind of culture shock, like I'm privy to someone operating in an alternate reality, where ignorance and prejudice are unchallenged.
What woman would want to buy time with this kind of guy? An extremely low-profile one, it turns out. These women are a small, tight-lipped minority in an industry dominated by the male client. Most male escorts service male clients, and escorts who service only women report almost unanimously that it's difficult to make a living.
It's something many do on the side for extra cash. Marco believes there are about six male escorts in Auckland catering exclusively to women. Most of the five Auckland-based male escorts I speak to confirm a recent increase in demand from women. Julie, co-owner of Sydney-based escort agency My Male Companion, says the company has also seen women clients increase by about 30 percent a year for the past few years.
Since prostitution was legalised in New Zealand in , a woman hiring a male escort is no longer involved in a criminal act, and this, combined with the ever-growing number of women with large independent incomes and the discretion afforded by the internet and mobile phone, has helped create a mini explosion in this micro-market.